If you can’t seem to find Mr. or Ms. Right no matter how hard you try, maybe you need to learn the basics of speed dating and spend less time trying, while meeting more people to choose from. Speed dating originated out of nowhere in the late 1990’s and makes use of a type of ‘round-robin’ or ‘musical chairs’ technique that allows you to meet several people one-one-one for ten minutes (or less) all at the same function. Once the ten minutes is up you move on to your next ‘date’. That really is all there is to the basics of speed dating!
Only ten minutes to find a potential soul mate?
If speed dating sounds pretty rushed and almost impossible to do – remember that the idea isn’t to pick the perfect mate out of the dating pool, but ten minutes is probably enough time to decide if you are interested in seeing them ever again! Speed dating also has the advantage that if you don’t like the other person you can end the date quickly and move on – no embarrassing silences or drawn-out dinners!
Once the Speed Dating Session is over how do you find the person again?
No contact details are usually exchanged during the ten minute speed dates but you will get a chance at the end of the evening to hand in a list of the people you think you would like to meet again. The team that organizes the dating evenings will keep track of potential matches and hand over personal information to each party if the matches ‘match’ so to speak.
What to wear and how to act on a speed dating evening
The idea is to dress appropriately and attractively so don’t want wear anything too outlandish but do make an effort to look good. Don’t overdress for your speed dates – you are trying to meet a potential mate not attract the ‘wrong’ kind of attention from those with ulterior motives.
Don’t expose your body too much and don’t wear items that positively scream desperation. In fact, the rules for speed dating are the same as any other date with a person you don’t know – dress attractively but keep it conservative.
Make sure that your clothes are comfortable and neat and clean and don’t wear brand new clothes if you can help it. Shoes and handbags should be clean and if you own a wedding or engagement ring that isn’t serving a purpose – take it off!
What to talk about during the Speed Date?
Ten minutes may not seem like a long time but ten minutes with nothing to say can feel like an eternity! Do bear in mind that speed dating isn’t an opportunity to flirt (though if this happens naturally, all the better – you may have found a good match!). This type of dating is similar to a normal date in which you spend time getting to know your partner and vice versa.
This isn’t the time to bash your previous dates or husbands and wives or to air your baggage. Think about how you would act on any other date. The only difference is that you will not have as much time together – at least on the first date.
Don’t try to be somebody you’re not as this can appear too obvious and make you look like you are trying too hard as well as making your date uncomfortable. You ARE trying to impress your potential matches but this should be sincere or it may end badly in the long run – when your date finds out you really aren’t who you say you are!
Be as relaxed as possible and try to make the other person feel at ease.